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Not knowing

There are so many times that I didn’t actually know what was up and had to ask Heavenly Father to help me understand. Then of course I had to keep going. Never really knowing if what I was doing was the correct thing to do. As a parent this happens all the time. It is difficult to know what to do especially with little babies. Even more so if they are the cranky type. Obviously in my life I have had quite a few of those. I remember many times  listening to my infant scream I had seriously done everything that I could think of and the only thing I could do was hold the baby and cry myself. Those days were spent praying, praying that I would be able to help this poor child and know what was causing the issue. Do I regret holding that baby, no!! In fact I didn’t get the answer at that point in time, but when I had another similar baby (albeit less cranky) I was able to at least get the medical community to address it. Honestly because of those experiences I have two awesome kids who are very loving towards little babies. I can’t help but think that this was part of the plan for my kids. It was not a very enjoyable experience for me, however, I did learn to humble myself and listen. I may not have liked the method, but the results are that I started learning to trust that there is a plan for my life and that I can survive regardless. Sometimes our hardest times bring out what we had inside of us all along. Heavenly Father knows what he is doing and gives us custom lessons that may not always be what we want to go through, but are exactly what we need to progress.